


driver's license

by galactic_cam



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anyways, Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Gen, Hopeful Ending, Hurt Peter Parker, Iron Dad, Irondad, Not Compliant With Canon Timeline, Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Has Panic Attacks, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, and she's actually included!, i didn't kill may parker so that's good, no beta we die like tony and natasha, not in like a "tony comes back to life maybe" way in a "maybe things will be okay eventually way", spider son, spiderson, st-rkers can go away you are not welcome here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:14:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28724934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/galactic_cam/pseuds/galactic_cam
Summary: Before the snap, Peter's 18th birthday had been coming up, and with it, his driver's license. He and Tony had planned a party for him when he drove up to the compound on his own for the first time, and they'd been looking forward to it for months. And then, a few weeks before their plans could be carried out, Thanos came and ruined everything.ORPeter drives up to the compound for the first time, and he drives up alone.
Relationships: May Parker (Spider-Man) & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	driver's license

**Author's Note:**

> me? hoping on tiktok's sudden obsession with driver's license by olivia rodrigo? never. but i was listening to the song and it DOES fit them, both in canon AND in this noncanon fic. this fic is, unfortunately, mostly canon compliant, other than the fact that I completely ignored the timeline and aged up Peter a bit so he could drive places by himself.
> 
> also yes i know it's been far too long since i've posted, so sorry to the three people who actually follow my work. also if this sucks, I wrote most of it at 2am and then the rest of it while procrastinating homework and then didn't reread it AT ALL before coming here and posting it for you.
> 
> tw// death, car accidents (no injury or harm), panic attacks, deer  
> as always if you need something tagged that I don't tag let me know!

_I got my driver's license last week_  
 _Just like we always talked about_  
 _'Cause you were so excited for me_  
 _To finally drive up to your house_  
 _But today I drove through the suburbs_  
 _Crying 'cause you weren't around_  
\-----------  
 _'Cause you said forever now I drive alone past your street_  
 _Yeah, you said forever now I drive alone past your street._

_\- driver's license, Olivia Rodrigo_

* * *

“May, I’m fine! I’m just going up to the compound, like we’ve planned for weeks.” Peter looked at his aunt, who was watching him with careful eyes.

  
“Okay, sweetheart, but be careful! Don’t want you losing your license on your first drive alone,” May told him nervously.

  
“May, who do you think I am? Of course I’ll be careful.” Peter gave her his best reassuring smile, and it seemed to soothe her nerves a bit. She ruffled his hair at the nape of his neck, and smiled.

  
“Okay, Peter, I’ll see you on Sunday. Larb you!”

  
“Larb you too, May.” Peter’s aunt got out of the car. He waited until she was inside their building before pulling out of the fire hydrant where he’d been loitering to drop her off and began to make his way up to the compound.

  
They’d been planning this for months.

  
Well, for him and May it had been months. For the other half of the world population, it had been 5 years (and a few months).  
But for him, it was a few months ago when Tony had suggested it. They were practicing his driving. Peter had started out hopelessly, and Tony was a good driver with hundreds of acres of empty land and roads for Peter to practice on. So there they were, sitting in one of Tony’s less expensive cars, and Tony had passingly mentioned that when Peter got his license, he could drive himself up the compound. After a while, it became a solid plan.

  
Peter was going to go with May to get his license on his 18th birthday, and drive up to the compound for the weekend and a big celebration up there with the rest of the Avengers. They’d been looking forward to it for months, and when the doughnut ship had flown down from the sky and taken them the Titan, it was 2 weeks until his birthday and his first drive alone to the compound.

  
And then he’d died.

  
One of his last thoughts was that he wouldn’t be able to drive up to the compound on his own. It was supposed to be a big day, and he was dying just short of it.  
And then he’d come back, woken up to the wizard guy (Dr. Strange, as he’d now learned) telling him he had to get up and fight some more, that it had been 5 years, and one of his first thoughts was that he could finally drive up to the compound and make Tony proud, make up for dying in his arms.

And then Tony had died, and Peter’s last thought before he went blank with grief was that he would never drive up to the compound.

  
It was Tony’s first and last thoughts too, although Peter didn’t know it. His first thought when Peter had died had been sadness that he wouldn’t be able to see Peter pull up to the compound, although it was followed by being consumed with the mind-numbing tragedy that he wouldn’t see Peter again, period. One of his final thoughts, before he had slipped away into darkness for the last time, had been that Peter would drive up to the compound and he wouldn’t be able to see it.

  
They had both been so excited for it. That much, Peter had known. Tony had made a countdown clock, and it was on his desk in the lab. It was marked on his calendar, and everytime Tony had greeted him it was always with “You have this many days until you drive back to the compound!”

  
The memory of the countdown clock as he drove through a random New York suburb almost made him have to pull over with sudden overwhelming urge to cry, to scream and to sob and to shout and to weep, but he kept driving, kept his eyes on the road, and tried to pretend that Tony was going to be waiting at the end of the drive.  
It didn’t work, and tears kept streaming down his cheeks.

  
Peter cycled through old memories of a dead man. He remembered the exact conversation they’d had when Tony had come up with the idea.

  
“Hey, Peter?”

  
“Yeah?” Peter glanced up from the chemistry homework he was working on.

  
“When you get your driver’s license, you can drive up here alone and we can have a big party the weekend of your 18th.”

  
“We have to see if I get it first, Tony.”

  
“You’ll get it. You’re Peter Parker, Spider-Man, and you can do anything. Including improving your disastrous driving skills enough in the next two months so you can get your license.”

  
Tony had always believed in him, even months before Peter’s driving skills were anywhere close to license-worthy.

  
Peter was supposed to be driving up to the compound, yes, but he was really supposed to be driving up to Tony. It wasn’t fair - Tony was Iron Man. He was supposed to stay forever, but solid and strong and there. But he wasn’t and Peter was driving alone to a compound where he would have a melancholy birthday celebration with no Tony Stark to make it fun.  
His 18th birthday was supposed to be fun.

  
It wasn’t going to be, though, because Tony Stark was dead.

  
He hadn’t even noticed he’d pulled over and stopped driving, doubling over himself and clinging to the steering wheel like it was Tony himself as he sobbed.

  
He remembered his first time properly driving with Tony, when there’d been a deer and he’d swerved to avoid it. They’d been fine, but Peter had pulled over to the side of the road and had a full-blown panic attack, sobbing and not being able to see or breath or think, and Tony had sat next to him, not touching him until Peter had leaned towards him, but talking in soft words anything he could think of.

  
Peter would give anything to be in that car, crying about an almost-accident, with Tony still alive.

  
At the time, Peter had wanted to give up, to get out of the car and walk to the passenger seat and have Tony drive them back to the compound. He never wanted to get back behind the steering wheel. He lived in the city - why did he need to drive? That’s what the subway and buses were for.

  
But Tony had told him the story of his first time driving, when he’d completely crashed the car into a lamppost, and Peter didn’t feel so bad anymore. Tony had told him that he had to keep trying, that he’d get better, and Peter had sat behind the wheel and driven them back up to the compound. Tony had sat next to him, coaching him through each turn, each stop and each start. And they’d gotten to the compound in one piece. The next day, they’d gone back out, and Peter had been just a little better.

  
In the present, Peter focused on keeping going. He wiped tears away, even though they were replaced by more, placed his hands on the steering wheel and his foot on the gas, and pulled out of the service lane.

  
Even if living without Tony at the end of the drive seemed impossible, Peter was sure he’d get better at it. Maybe tomorrow, it wouldn’t be such a monumental task.

**Author's Note:**

> i hope this made you cry, and i hope you enjoyed it anyways. I have more canon-compliant stuff in the works which is fun and spicy but since it's multi-chapter(!?!) i want it DONE before I start posting. be on the lookout.


End file.
